Here's how to channel your BDE when it comes to getting dressed, third leg not required.
To start, some context: Big Dick Energy, or BDE, entered the culture by way of a now-deleted Ariana Grande tweet that made reference to Pete Davidson's Subway-jingle-sized dick. Allison Davis at The Cut then wrote the textbook on Big Dick Energy, summarizing it as "a quiet confidence and ease with oneself that comes from knowing you have an enormous penis and you know what to do with it. It's not cockiness, it's not a power trip—it's the opposite: a healthy, satisfied, low-key way you feel yourself." And to clarify, no, you do not physically need a big dick to have BDE. Running a deli out of your pants might help, but BDE is a feeling that transcends the physical realm.
But back to the clothes. Not everyone with BDE is well-dressed, but having BDE seems to be a prerequisite to being one of the best-dressed people in the world. It's not a coincidence that most supremely well-dressed people have BDE. The Big Dick Energy coming off Rihanna in a see-through Swarovski gown or a giant eggy gown could power large metropolises. BDE is what allows Harry Styles to get away with wearing a matching floral suit with bootcut trousers. Why do you think Justin Bieber is proudly showing off his puberty 'stache on Instagram? Only BDE explains it. BDE is powerful, BDE is swag-enabling, BDE is patient, BDE is kind, wait…
Most of the language used to describe BDE even overlaps with how we describe the best-dressed people: effortless, confident, self-assured. BDE is the difference between pulling off those cool new shoes you bought and looking like a try-hard dork. (Don't worry, you're pulling them off; BDE did that.) For someone with BDE, no style is off limits. So in that spirit we've put together a list that serves as a sort of litmus test. If you can pull these off, you have BDE. If not, hopefully you have a six-pack.
1. A Showoff Runway Piece
2. Footwear That Gives No F*cks
3. Anything That Shows Your Actual Dick
4. A Suit Fit for a Frontman
Matching floral-print suit, large bootcut leg openings, wearing it onstage at Madison Square Garden in front of thousands? That's Big Fit Energy.
5. "Designer" shorts.
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6. Mesh Shorts
A.k.a. post-sex shorts. Sometimes BDE clothes are the most obvious ones, like these mesh shorts. The key isn't so much that you're wearing them, but that you look cool wearing them. Harder than it seems.
7. Literally Anything Tom Ford
Tom Ford's expertly tailored suits ooze BDE—that is, when you wear 'em like the designer does: with a shirt unbuttoned down to your navel. But also: his colognes emit BDE, his stores are built from BDE, and his bath-taking routine—if you can adopt it—can only improve one's BDE.
8. Zero-Fucks-Given Grooming
Justin Bieber's complete disinterest in caring for himself at all showcases a distinct subgenre of BDE style. It's not easy to nail, only because A. you have to already be handsome enough that a trash-stache seems quaint and B. you need to mildly revel in it, but not be creepy about it or keep it for so long that it becomes your new brand.
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