The 9 most bonkers revelations from the Stormy Daniels interview we've all been waiting for.

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Happy Stormy Sunday! Unless you've been living under a rock, you know that Stormy Daniels, the porn star suing the president to break a $130,000 non-disclosure agreement to talk about their alleged affair, gave an interview with Anderson Cooper that aired on CBS' 60 Minutes tonight. And if you have been living under a rock, congrats! That seems awesome.

The rest of us have not, unfortunately. And we've been, in the words of J-Lo, 🎶waiting for tonight🎶🎶

Tonight, Stormy Daniels tells Anderson Cooper about her alleged affair with Mr. Trump and the "hush agreement" with potential legal and political implications for the president. https://t.co/oRyeczcmYG

— 60 Minutes (@60Minutes) March 25, 2018

Here are the seven most bonkers revelation from the highly anticipated interview, according to America's most unexpected superhero, Stormy Daniels:

1) Trump and Stormy started hanging out when he offered her a spot on The Apprentice. She never appeared on the show.

"He goes, 'Got an idea, honey bunch,'" she told Cooper. "'Would you ever consider going on and — and being a contestant?' And I laughed and said, 'NBC's never gonna let, you know, an adult film star be on.'

2) Trump insisted, because she's smart. TRUMP DESCRIBED A WOMAN BY HER INTELLIGENCE.

"He goes, 'No, no,' he goes, 'That's why I want you.'" Daniels told Cooper. "'You're gonna shock a lotta people, you're smart and they won't know what to expect.'"

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3) The infamous Forbes spanking was Stormy's idea.

4) Apparently spanking is the only thing that can shut up Trump. Hint hint, everyone in the White House.

5) TRUMP TOLD STORMY HE AND MELANIA HAVE SEPARATE ROOMS.

Anderson Cooper: Melania Trump had recently given birth... Did that-- did he mention his wife or child at all in this?

Stormy Daniels: I asked. And he brushed it aside, said, "Oh yeah, yeah, you know, don't worry about that. We don't even-- we have separate rooms and stuff."

— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) March 25, 2018

6) Trump also told Stormy she reminded him of Ivanka. HE ALSO TOLD KAREN MCDOUGAL THIS ("allegedly" but, like, it's clearly his thing).

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And here's where things get even uglier (I know, hard to imagine):

7) Daniels says she was "physically threatened" by an "unidentified man" in 2011 who told her to "leave Trump alone."

Stormy Daniels tells "60 Minutes" she and her young daughter were physically threatened by an unidentified man in Las Vegas in 2011 if she revealed her affair with Donald Trump

— Laura Litvan (@LauraLitvan) March 25, 2018

8) The guy allegedly threatened her in front of and directly to her child.

"A guy walked up on me and said to me, 'Leave Trump alone. Forget the story'," Stormy Daniels said. "And then he leaned around and looked at my daughter and said, 'That's a beautiful little girl. It'd be a shame if something happened to her mom.' And then he was gone."

— Laura Litvan (@LauraLitvan) March 25, 2018

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Daniels says she ultimately signed the $130,000 non-disclosure agreement with Trump because she was "concerned for my family and their safety."

9) TRUMP MADE HER WATCH SHARK WEEK.

Stormy Daniels says on the second occasion with Donald Trump, they didn't have sex but just watched Shark Week. The meet-up was to discuss whether she could appear on Celebrity Apprentice. She did not appear.

— Josh Dawsey (@jdawsey1) March 25, 2018

WTF IS UP WITH DONALD TRUMP AND SHARKS??

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I mean, it's pretty obvious: he is one.

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