Jumat, 30 Desember 2016

The dumbest celebrity quotes of 2016

Justin Bieber blew up at cheering fans while on tour this year.

Jessica SagerNY Post

If MENSA is considering admitting any bold-faced names to their ranks, they may want to take a peek at this list first. From cringe-worthy couple confirmations to TMI sex talk, these celebrity sound bites will have you scratching your head.

1. "I actually don't like thinking. I think people think I like to think a lot. And I don't. I don't like to think."

- Kanye West

Kanye delivered some real pearlers this year.

Kanye delivered some real pearlers this year.Source:Supplied

The 39-year-old rapper shocked no one with his revelation to Harper's Bazaar magazine, in which he also gushed of wife Kim Kardashian, "I love her nude selfies. Like, I love the ones from the side, the back ones and the front."

2. "Now I can say that I still haven't had an abortion, but I wish I had."

- Lena Dunham

Lena came under fire for her comments about abortion.

Lena came under fire for her comments about abortion.Source:AP

Dunham, 30, made the facepalm-inducing comment on her podcast, then apologised, noting, "My words were spoken from a sort of 'delusional girl' persona I often inhabit, a girl who careens between wisdom and ignorance (that's what my TV show is too) and it didn't translate."

3. "I don't know if you've ever read the Kurt Vonnegut short story where everybody has to take these pills to make your private parts feel like wet sponges and then nobody can have sex and no one can procreate. And so by the time I'm older, and I'm like, 'I think I want to be a mother,' they're like, 'You can't, your private part feels like a sponge.'"

- Jennifer Lawrence

Jennifer has a fear of 'sponges.'

Jennifer has a fear of 'sponges.'Source:Getty Images

The Oscar winner also said she was terrified of the Zika virus.

4. "The problem is these shoes are abusive. I can't put them on alone. I'm not going to lie about it."

- Mariah Carey

Mariah needs a small army to help her get ready.

Mariah needs a small army to help her get ready.Source:Splash News Australia

The diva, 46, explained why she had four people to help her put on heels. "It's taking me a minute to put these shoes on," Carey said. "They always have to get so cute and then they can't go on right." She added, "Oprah told me, 'Don't let anyone think that you don't know how to put your shoes on anymore!'"

5. "When ur lil baby cops u the Bentley truck and hides your Ferrari. Guess I can't be mad."

- Tyga

Tyga had an interesting explanation for reports his Bentley was repossessed.

Tyga had an interesting explanation for reports his Bentley was repossessed.Source:News Corp Australia

This is how the rapper denied reports his Ferrari was actually repossessed while he and girlfriend Kylie Jenner visited a Bentley dealership.

6. "That's the problem! You let someone lick your ass, and look what happens. Don't let anyone lick your ass!"

- Leah Remini

Leah had some advice for 50 Cent.

Leah had some advice for 50 Cent.Source:Supplied

Remini teased 50 Cent about his bedroom proclivities after the rapper lamented that ex Vivica A. Fox allegedly spread rumours that he was into men.

7. "I just don't like … I don't consider myself that. I don't even want to say that word."

- Teresa Giudice

Teresa doesn't label herself as a criminal.

Teresa doesn't label herself as a criminal.Source:Supplied

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star refused to say the word "criminal" in regards to herself or her husband, despite pleading guilty to federal charges of bankruptcy fraud, conspiracy to commit mail fraud, wire fraud, failing to pay taxes and spending 15 months in prison.

8. "Your horse face ass woke up on the wrong side of the stable and decide to go overboard with your f**k boy comments."

- Blac Chyna

Don't mess with Blac Chyna.

Don't mess with Blac Chyna.Source:AP

The former stripper and future Kardashian waged war against Wendy Williams after the talk show host criticised Chyna and her mom, Tokyo Toni, on her show.

9. "As soon as I hear there is a famous penis out there, I am the first person to ravenously devour it online."

- Seth Rogen

Seth Rogen likes to check out male celebrities in their natural form.

Seth Rogen likes to check out male celebrities in their natural form.Source:AFP

Rogen was delighted by Orlando Bloom's nude paddle-boarding shots. He added, "I've seen Justin [Bieber]'s before, so maybe I was like, you know, 'I've been there, done that,' a little bit. And it's a wonderful one!"

10. "I cry for her and for all the smart people I love."

- Amy Schumer

Amy was very emotional about the US election.

Amy was very emotional about the US election.Source:AP

Schumer was devastated by Hillary Clinton's loss and reneged on her promise to leave the country. "First of all the interview where I said I would move was in London and was said in jest," she griped. "Not that anyone needs more than a headline to count something as official news."

11. "The truth is that Taylor Swift and I are together, and we're very happy. Thanks for asking. That's the truth. It's not a publicity stunt."

- Tom Hiddleston

Tom confirmed his romance with Taylor in a very awkward fashion.

Tom confirmed his romance with Taylor in a very awkward fashion.Source:News Corp Australia

This is how Hiddleston awkwardly confirmed his relationship with Swift in July. By September, the exceedingly publicised couple had called it quits.

12. "Realistically, to be honest, I really don't want to [press charges]. Because I just don't want this in the media."

- Azealia Banks

Oh, Azealia.

Oh, Azealia.Source:Getty Images

The irony-challenged rapper explained to the media why she didn't want a potential lawsuit against Russell Crowe playing out … in the media.

13. "There was definitely some half-chubbing going on during the [Body Moves] video. I wouldn't say a full-blown boner, but I would say a halfie."

- Joe Jonas

That's a bit of an overshare, Joe.

That's a bit of an overshare, Joe.Source:Getty Images

The DNCE singer gave way too much information in a Q & A, in which he also speculated on whether his penis was bigger than those of brothers Nick and Kevin. "I like to think so," he mused. "Although, it's not often that I'm in a locker room or shower with my brothers, so I couldn't really tell you. But, I'd like the internet to believe that I'm still killin' it."

14. "I love my tits being out. It's like, one of my things, I guess."

- Kendall Jenner

Kendall knows what works for her.

Kendall knows what works for her.Source:Supplied

Jenner, 21, explained that she's not shy at all about showing off her supermodel bod.

15. "The screaming in these breaks has got to stop. Please and thank you. I don't think it's necessary when I'm trying to say something and you guys are screaming."

- Justin Bieber

Justin had some stern words for fans at his concert.

Justin had some stern words for fans at his concert.Source:Getty Images

The Canadian crooner whined that his once-beloved Beliebers in Manchester, UK, just need to quiet down … then stormed off stage when they wouldn't stop showing their enthusiasm.

16. "I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of, since 2009."

- Taylor Swift

Taylor doesn't want anything to do with Kanye.

Taylor doesn't want anything to do with Kanye.Source:AP

In July, Kim Kardashian posted a video of Swift appearing to give her longtime nemesis West her blessing to rap about her in "Famous." Swift later denied approving the lyrics, claiming in February that she'd never even been made aware of the "that bitch" line. Swift's line went viral, with even West's pal John Legend quoting it on Twitter.

This story originally appeared in NY Post and is republished here with permission.

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Recommended article: The Guardian's Summary of Julian Assange's Interview Went Viral and Was Completely False.



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