Published 6:52 pm, Friday, January 5, 2018
Michelle Long
Michelle Long
Astrid Lacitis
Astrid Lacitis
Jill Gumina
Jill Gumina
A: Relocating is difficult, but for children it can be overwhelming, especially if they are moving from the only home they have ever known and leaving their friends, teachers and community. When helping my clients with relocation, I suggest that they involve their children in the planning as soon as possible. Children need time to process changes and involving them will help them to not feel powerless.
Whether you will be purchasing a home or renting, include them in the decision making regarding what type of neighborhood they would like to live in, how they want to decorate their new bedroom—even if that means purple walls and Justin Bieber posters—and what kind of amenities they would like to have, for example, having a garden or playroom. However, do not cave in and give up the master bedroom.
Lastly, I would recommend that the children's bedroom be unpacked and set up prior to their arrival. It will be less stressful for them if they can settle into the new bedroom with their favorite things already out of boxes. Plan something fun for the first couple of days like testing out the local ice cream shops or parks. Remember to stay positive and make this an adventure for them.
Michelle Long, The Agency, (415) 602-0307, michelle.long@theagencyre.com.
A: Children thrive on familiarity and routines. Learning they are moving can be traumatic. Some kids may have trouble understanding, especially if they weren't involved in the decision-making process.
Prepare your kids by informing them early about the move. If possible, give them time to adjust. Talk about the move to reinforce that it is real and happening. Like adults, kids' immediate reaction can be fear of the unknown. Give them plenty of info about the move, encourage questions. Answer honestly and prepare for a variety of reactions.
If moving nearby, take your kids to see the new destination. Visualizing where they are going helps to relieve anxiety. Involve kids as much as possible. They'll feel they're a contributing part of the event. Encourage their participation: have them view properties on the internet so they'll feel they're helping to find a home in their new town.
If moving away, show them images of the new destination: city/parks/school. Discover activities they can be involved in. Being supportive, loving, and patient will help your children - and you - adjust to the change in a positive way.
Jill Gumina, Hill & Co. Real Estate, (415) 265-1717, jkgumina@gmail.com.
A: I was a little more than a year old when my family left Europe. Latvia had ceased to exist as an independent country, and educated people like my parents, a civil engineer and an attorney, were a threat. Five moves within South America were not a big deal for my brother and I—our parents had made it very clear these were all job-related relocations, and prepared us well ahead of time. We hung out with the new neighbor kids, we all spoke Spanish.
And then, the big move: to the United States. What an adventure. What an opportunity. And what an adjustment—new language, new customs. But the local Latvians welcomed us, eased the transition. Lesson to be gleaned from this: Prepare your kids, turn the move into an adventure, and settle in your new community quickly.
Astrid Lacitis, Vanguard Properties, (415) 860-0765, astrid@vanguardsf.com.
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